The last thing any married person wants to hear is the word “divorce”. This especially holds true for stay at home mothers. They have devoted their lives to raising the children and creating a proper, loving home for their families. Now, the rug is being pulled out from under them. Besides the emotional response and upheaval common with divorce situations, there is also the question of family dynamics. If the mother has never worked outside the home or has been out of the work force for some time, getting back out there can be traumatic for her and her children. In an instant, everything is different.
If you even suspect that things are going wrong in your marriage, be prepared. If a divorce is imminent you need to protect yourself. There are ways to make sure that you and your children are protected financially.
First, consult a lawyer. If you already have a family lawyer, choose someone else. You don’t know if your husband has already consulted the family lawyer for “hypothetical advice” concerning divorce proceedings.
Once you have found a lawyer, confide in them about the situation. They can tell you what you need to know about your spouse and what documents you need to obtain in order to present your case for support should divorce proceedings take place. It’s not going to be easy or pleasant, but for the sake of the children, follow the lawyer’s instructions.
Every woman needs to know about the financial well-being of her household. If your husband died, you would need to know about life insurance policies, mortgage payments, other debts in both your names, and assets. The same goes for a divorce. Find out your spouse’s income and the cost of running your household on a monthly basis. If you get the house or have to move, you will need to know the amount of money necessary to keep you going.
For the stay at home mother there is another stark reality-you’ll need to begin work outside the home. Depending on the divorce settlement, you may be able to support your family with a part-time job. The children will still have the benefit of your presence on a consistent basis. This is where knowing the monthly cost to run your household comes in handy. This information can be used by the judge to determine the alimony amount paid by your spouse. If, by some miracle the alimony allows you not to have to work outside the home right away, take a few classes to get ready to reenter the workforce.
Divorce is unpleasant for everyone involved. Don’t let your emotions overwhelm you. Protect yourself and your children’s future by being prepared for any eventuality.
More Resources:
Grab a copy of the Guide to Family Budgeting.
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