Moms Talk Network

This article was written by Guest Blogger Vicki Jardine of Permission To Shine.

Hey there to all the busy moms reading this. Have you ever felt like you are a pretty good mom and that things are going along ok until you read an article on how to be a better parent only to then feel like a worse parent?

I have. And I look at that and think why I am like that? Why don’t I take the intended messages and apply them to becoming a better mom? Why do I get the message about what I am not doing well and instantly feel discouraged?

I think it’s because I wanted very badly to be a ‘great parent’ and I was already flat out. If I added too much more to my ‘plate’, I wouldn’t be able to keep it up and I may fail more.

My children have grown up now and I get to look at motherhood differently and I have to say it is a lot easier as a grandparent.

Being a mom is such a 24/7/365 role that can feel like one big list of ‘things to do’. And sadly, for some moms it’s a list of things they feel they are failing at. A list of things that they ‘don’t do’ or ‘don’t do often enough or consistently enough to be effective’.

I don’t think moms should feel like it’s a matter of failing or succeeding. But it’s true, our kids only get one childhood and we moms don’t want to mess it up. This is why I believe that consciously working with your child to help them develop self-confidence is one of the best starting places for moms to gain real encouragement. When you help your child develop confidence, you gain a more communicative, cooperative, helpful, happy and peaceful child who has problem-solving skills.

Imagine how different everything could be, (morning routines, after school and evenings, dinner times and car time), if your child felt enough confidence in him/herself to explain their feelings to you? But then even if they had the confidence, they would need to have the understanding of their emotions and also have an emotional vocabulary so they could describe their feelings. And they would have to have confidence in you as well, that you would respect and value their feelings. Developing ‘confidence’ touches so many parts of a child’s life…and a mom’s.

I believe that if a mom comes from a place of ‘How can I make sure that every interaction I have with my child leads to him/her building self-confidence?’ then children would begin to blossom and family life would be a lot easier for moms as a result.

photo credit: Megyarsh